Sorcerer’s spell

(Photo Credit: Creative Commons)

Darkness in form

Like a sorcerer’s spell

Flames birth

With a metallic sheen

Shadows of white whisper left behind

Cut, cut, cut

Water made with snow dust

And into the needle it goes

Pressure encircling my arm

Quick little pain

Bulging vein

Quake in release

Quiet hopeful yearning

Rush to my head

Throbbing like a flooding river

Fire under my skin

Mind like a helium balloon

Hitch in my breath

Queer crawling itch

Chemical wizards command

My life feels better

The Victim

(Photo Credit: CC, http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ARage.jpg)

Written on: 10/13/12

The cold is bitter,
Unrelenting;
It's teeth rip and tear at my flesh.
I have, no escape.
There is, no peace,
Within this existence.
The walls of my mind have frozen over,
All that's left, is for that sharp wind,
To shatter my mind. Keleidoscopadigm.

Similarly, as with everything else.
To become the dust,
Which, with the wind,
Becomes glass, and it cuts,
Buries itself within my skin.
Like the tortured screams
Crying from within.
If only such a weapon,
Could be turned against
All the vicious fools
Whose enmity I posses,
But I have none,
No tool, nowhere to run
I have but to endure,
Carry each scar like a gem encrusted necklace.

I have that curse,
It is mine to wear,
I would have it no other way,
But I would if it were there.
Such a contradiction does not exist,
But it exists within me, none the less.

I say this with certainty
For one reason only,
Those fools,
Who bear me such enmity,
Would not do such,
If they lived as I must.
As target, for their amusement.
And a stool, to stand upon.
Like the corner stones of old,
I am the foundation for their home,
A tower of torture, and pain, which deems;
I am the victim,
Hear my scream!

The Solitary Solution

(Photo Credit: CC, http://www.wallpaperup.com/30507/candles_fire_flame_reflection_bokeh_zen.html)

The shadow crept along the floor,
Ears pricked up as I heard that noise,
And louder, and louder in the darkening hour,
With intensity unknown by some phantasms power.
Such a shock to the senses with noises and glimpses
Of a ghost each time the candle light flickers.
Nearly missed me, with the grimmest of sickness.
Lifts up my fears, with the meekest restrictions.
Condemn the madness, with which it is positioned.
Seethed in the moments, between each constriction,
And exhalation, as each breath leaves me.
The warmth of my body, not nearly concealing
The cold in the room, which I find in my being,
And bearing in mind that my thoughts are reeling,
Feeling the chill, in the air, that I'm breathing.
So nearly the real thing, that I scarcely believe in,
Creep in my skin, like some poison I'm drinking.
When touched to my lips, as if death that I'm fearing,
Reach inside me, as no living thing can be.
Such a horror, to feel that harrowing perspective,
As a crop in the harvest seasons introspection.
Not nearly so strong, as the mirrors reflection
But as mimicked as a mime, in the crowds I live in.
Reaching in to feel the fathoms fleeing,
And trusting that I am not just a ghost,
Host to some passenger, who seems such a stranger,
And languish in anger, while the feelings escaping.
Solitude is in no way the solution,
But rather the resolution of my exclusions.

What lies between

(Photo Credit: CC, http://blogs.egu.eu/geolog/2013/11/18/imaggeo-on-mondays-that-spot-there-its-143000-kilometres-across/)

Written on: 10/13/12

Such an epic to see those living wonders
That I would carry them forever in my pocket
If I were able I would fold them up
And carefully place them while wearing gloves
Not to tarnish or stain their very presence
With that taint which exist with me inherent
I could see them now in that distant place
Like two worlds apart with no separation between
Not even a foot, or any measure distinct
Such beauty and serene scenes
Tied up with no word to discern them
Only comparisons from one to the other
Intertwined like oceans and water
Where one is hard and solid and bare
The other is incorporeal shifting and fair
While one is strong and monumentous
That by seeing its twin you'd think it victorious
But how can one win in standards not there
When in not one way can either compare
So if you ever by chance see a mountain so tall
That it wraps around the sky's grand walls
Think to yourself as you're want to do
What lies between the earth, the heavens, and you

Mariloth's Last Journey (Part One)

     Hello everyone, I would like to thank the great people over at Free Fiction Friday for letting me join their wonderful group of writers, and their kind words of welcome.

     I hope you enjoy this piece, it's part one of an ongoing short story; it's set in a wondrous and frightening place. Full of remarkable, mystifying, and strange things, both terrifying and soothing simultaneously.

(Photo Credit: CC, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Shadows_in_Coldfall_wood.jpg)

     Blood pounded in her ears as her heartbeat quickened with each pressing step. Terror and adrenaline coursed through her veins. She clutched her abdomen to protect her baby, her chest burning with every gulp of air.  Dried twigs snapped under foot as branches slapped at her, scratching her neck and arms. Each breath a struggle, every step more difficult than the last, she had only one concern: baby. The wind beat her with unfettered fury; she opposed it, driving against it with all of her energy. The autumn air bit and tore her flesh, and loose stones dug into the bottoms of her unprotected feet.

     Strained; faint, but she could hear them from behind, pressing in, hunting.

     She began to slip and reached out, slowing her pace. Fingers felt chapped bark and unguent sap; she grabbed a kelt tree. She paused to look over her shoulder, fearful. Departing, her eyes absorbed the splayed trail, it wasn't her imagination playing tricks. She began to run with a renewed sense of dread. She held back a sob and forced her feet to move, move, and move.

     Ahead of her a low cleft crabbed by trees, she headed there. Down between slender gaps she descended. Huddling near the base of an groa tree, her eyes full of tears, arms draped around her legs, rocking back and forth. This was the end.

     Peering around the trunk of the grao she saw her pursuers: creatures on all four legs, charging right at her. Their skin was scarred, blackened like burnt coal in a fire. Immense teeth protruded from the edges of their mouths. Above; Penetrating cerise eyes. The bones in the backs of these creatures protruded like volatile waves, many of the bones in their bodies jutted above the muscle and sinew to form terrible appendages. Mariloth found herself caught in their glare.

     As her hand sweat soaked into the bark of the tree, an alluring sensation ran up her finger tips, spreading throughout her hand and up her arm. A sense of calm flooded her, eliminating all the fear and worry. The warmth transubstantiated into a pulse gaining an intensity that threatened to envelope her. She looked down, her arm had taken on the hue of the bark. The energy surged through her body. She pressed against the tree and sank into it. Taking a fathomless breathe she felt a coldness fill her lungs, contrast against the warmth inside her. Slowly the cold receded and the sensation filled her completely, she plunged ahead. She saw nothing, but felt warmth, vibrant and smooth. Standing there in the darkness realizing she could feel the wind; its  breeze bonhomously stroking her skin and hair. Her legs no longer ached, and her feet so swollen and bruised were soothed from below; they'd joined with the roots in the irriguous earth. The cuts and scratches from rocks and thorns all seemed to fade away and there was no pain. The trees next to her blithely brushed her arms with their branches. She was smiling, tears of wonder and joy dampening her cheeks. She could feel her child moving inside her, and wondered if that was the way she felt to the grao, one life swelling and growing, living and thriving inside another. Did she feel like a child in the womb?

     She was brought abruptly to herself as something touched her tree, a claw was scraped against the root to her right. The creatures had caught up to her. Her scent lingered around the tree, but they didn't know which way she went from there; they couldn't find her. She waited, they searched the area around the cleft, looking for signs of her, tracking her. There was nothing to find. It appeared that she had just disappeared, her footprints ending at the tree. They walked around the area, inspecting the branches and leaves of nearby foliage, looking for snapped twigs, moved stones or disturbed debris. As they examined the ditch under the cleft they began to move about in a frenetic manner, confused by the disappearance of their prey. She couldn't help but smile at the way they murderously searched the area, and hoped the end of her chase was near.

     They came together and began to grunt and whimper. A large one stood in the center, its size shadowing the others, grunt; his harsh order bellowed, and they all scattered. She felt them move over the land, like drops of water falling onto her feet. She stayed in the tree, crying and thanking the tree. She had been running for so long, with terror as her enduring allegiant. Now she had security, and her weariness crushed her. She slipped into sleep, with the tree sheltering her and her unborn.

________________________________________________________________________________

     Let me know what you think, comments are greatly appreciated, and don't forget to check out all of the other great authors who participate in Free Fiction Friday. 

________________________________________________________________________________

     Be sure to check out the other stories;

     Follow all of your favorites and read the first 100 words on the groups website:

FREE FICTION FRIDAY

Creations Songs

(Photo Credit: http://www.fotothing.com/losp/photo/b4881dd20de6711f86f91615dd3cc29b/)

The cobalt sky

Apparent

Maybe not so clear

The open sea

Raging 

Though not in anger

The wide earth

Shaking

But not for fear

The birds caw 

Not for hunger

But because you vanished

Wild beasts

Shriek and lament

Hoard every miserable tear

Creatures of the deep

Thrash and wail
Remain still

The birds sing in my garden

In the world, I seize

In the aquatic, I soak

In the heavens, I soar

Positioned here to bring you, near

My heart thirsts

My tongue calls

My body quakes

For you

Desire,

I'll wait

For you to join me

To quell the screeching sky

To quiet the howling sea

Silence the screaming earth

Above our heads

Beneath our feet
Inside our heart

Surround our souls

The world is calm

And so are we

And so are we

Except when you aren’t near

My body quakes

Heart aches

Soul screams

For you to be, here

By my side, with me

Stand in my garden green

Design, for your pleasure

The world I saw, complete

The ache that disappears, dies

Is washed away, pushed aside

Filled with love, for you, from me

Showed to the world

Revealed, for all, to perceive.

Re-Ascend

(Photo Credit: CC, http://www.tikkun.org/tikkundaily/2014/03/26/an-alternative-to-the-neocon-response-to-putin-modernize-and-democratize-nato-send-love-to-russian-people/)

Forget not what I have said

That all the torturous foibles we’re given

We bequeath to them

Our sacrifices were left ineffectual

Though none may assume our mettle

As hectic heretical men

Shout and say

What does this now represent

Well surely you can accept

That the time is now

There’s no need to repent

You’ve said what you've come to say

And what it was you meant

Don’t fracture your will

With ill gotten sentiments

Some may call to you

Those self proclaimed friends

But hear me now

And you will not regret

The false hoods of men

Who know not their report

Their value will not be placed in gold and silver

But fought over with gunpowder and steel

Though these men may sacrifice as is their fate

For a partial fee in gold far less than their weight

So would you heed the call

Of unrighteous men

Who refuse to believe

The plea of weaker survivors

Who rather than struggle against

What we can plainly see is impotent at best

They join the fighting

Of our enemies cause

Foolish and undisciplined

Those genuflected fallow gentlemen

Lullaby

(Photo Credit: CCL, https://iamachild.wordpress.com/2011/07/26/asako-eguchi-1952-japanese/)

Written on: 10/12/12

I just want to sleep
And dream the dream of kings
Where my name is known among the stars
Like lullaby's from worlds so far
To feel the rest with weariness all gone
As if but all those living almost lost
Had to have but one wish
And that is that those memories could slip
And fall like comets across the horizon
So that each passing moment passes without requirement
For if in the waking world unseen
To see our lives as if but a dream
Then keep our precious perfect purpose
So preposterous that we could hope for this
But I just want to sleep
Such restful sleep as I have ever known
And would never know again
For if I dream I wish never to leave
And live there in that world of pleasantries
Don't take me back to the waking
Keep my mind from breaking
And tearing down those walls so high
So much so that I want to believe the lie
That those bells could ring
And let them ring
Let my ears soften with each passing
And count them like sheep
As I fall into that sleep
And wake no more
I want to dream
And dream of those things which sustain
And don't crash into my brain so abusively
Like tornadoes lifting my home
I want to rest , and feel the rest
All gone, all left, all buried without recompense
Don't take me down into that hollow ground
And bury me with your words
Don't tear at my mind one syllable at a time
So that you can feel superior
I want to sleep so I can escape
And feel secure within the interior
Like Alice lost beyond the mirror
Don't fret to me like some killer bee
And break me in my solace
Don't shake me in my bed
I don't want to wake
And wield it any more
I can't wear this shroud any longer
I seem lost like some greedy imposter
No home for me ever seemed
No where I could sleep
But now I have and have it I shall
For if not for you I would have long ago drown
But you wake me and curse me
With every breath
Like a tear-stained handkerchief
Why take me away from this peace of mind
Like a burdened over-worn horse gone on its last ride
And you want to ride me still
And bury me on that hill
Why not burn me while I'm alive
It'd be better that way
In the end
Instead of hearing those bells ring
But you should let them ring
And ring they shall
Like some hollow wish put up for sell
But I will have my dream
And sleep the sleep of kings
You can't stop me then
When I'm in my head
And carried across the wind
For in that dream
I will walk among the stars
Singin lullaby's from worlds so far

Reclaimed

(Photo Credit: Creative Commons, https://www.pinterest.com/elianefidalgo/flower-fields/)

Written on 1/12/2010

The deep crevices and cracks of the earth
Dry and emaciated the fields they were barren
The heat of the day scorched the parched soil
As it begged for some release
An escape from the harsh plowing of the farmer’s trowel
The constant and relentless stamping and stomping
No rest for the weary as the earth is surely
And from below its pain does not quell
No streams beneath the dirt that could rise above
And no rain felled from the heavens
Like mighty titans or ancient angels turned devils
No respite save the vanished past
Or recourse save some patience
Memories of before the man
He came and placed the soles of his shoes
Deep as the foundations of his home
He labored on the hillside tearing down the foliage
Grown from saplings and raised by the earth herself
Her sweet children who dug their way deep into her heart
So easily were they slain
Simple strokes of sweat and steel
Their timber was the first of what he stole
Soon he forged down and deeper
Destroying all of her bountiful home
He tore up the ground and sown new seeds
But these too he stole
He left nothing to feed the ground
And the earth she began to starve
Still he labored and plowed the fields
And tore on through the years
But through each passing hour of every turned down day
Slowly she began to fade
What came from the earth was not returned
All things must eventually expire
What she could give began the coming of its last days
She was too barren to produce any fruit
There was no more that she could give
But the old farmer he had died a long the way
And his children and theirs too soon began to wane
Eventually they were gone
With their filth their torment and their stench
Slowly she could feed her children again
She too was fed
For no rain could come for the starving earth
No downpour in which she could escape
But now as the land rediscovered its origin
The water too was reclaimed
The deep crevices were filled with that drink they so craved
As men left her fields
Life returned again

One and the Same

(Photo Credit: Creative Commons)

(http://stockarch.com/images/objects/young-boy-unlocking-door-7249)

Written on 02/15/13

In that place so dark

Surrounded by water and stone

And bellows puffed so low that the coals barely stay warm

And swarms of smoke and ash

Burning the sight of no known soul

Where once men were alive now they foster those shores

Lore once said to place coins upon their eyes

To be spied by ferryman whence the crow flies

Now to casket and depths of a watery grave

Save the immortal cries whilst the brave stay unpaid

Lain and slain for worries not their own

Sown and reaped like a harvest gone to mold

Crowned so loudly that the deaf hear those tones

"Here ye, here ye!" the chorus once spoke

To listen as a burden to the fathoms of a ghost

And toast to all the courage for those who pass beyond

Long heard the stories even after the last line is lost

And tossed aside and asunder

Thunder like fire burns under the rubble

So terrible a sound as one has ever heard

Absurd as the mourning widow whose husband laughs with girth

And birth of a dying man who has seen all before

Seven scores when only once since they've been to the seashore

Yet beckoned still by the seafloor to sever

And yet never fill the hole in their soul

Cold as a winter night when icy grip strips flesh to the floor

And you call that bravery simplified into stupidity

Lucidity of a mind which is riddled with irrationality

So crass this idea of a mask worn by the dead

Upon their head as if to cover the naked truth of decay

So to say that even now as we stand upon the door

Cordially approached and even then only ever reached the threshold

Untold countless have bathed in blood to stand there

And here you wait patiently to twist the knob

Thump and throb beats the cavity in your chest

Yet even then you still pretend

And tend to a notion so superfluous

Is it patience that impedes you or just the desire to torture us

Those fools each one so doomed

Each and every one succumbed

And breathed the cold air in hopes of truth

Regretfully misled like a mosquito to its death

With tales of riches and lavish gifts

Lifted the pale face each one is blessed with

And sifting each speck of sand through the tides

And ride upon a beast whose purpose in never alive

To tell the tale of a memory sorely kept

To be leapt upon by some ancient curse

Loosed upon the weary and unsuspecting both

Loath to show what is never to be known

Sown into the memory of a huntsman's crossbow

So low is the intention guided by pretension

Such apprehension as one has ever felt

Nelt to the altar like some forsworn sovereign

So common as the madness which is their knowledge

Like the hedge to the garden where curiosity is harbored

Labored by the masses who each take a pass at this

Contemptuous amassed with every failure

Lured to the door which you refuse to open

Like a token commiserating where you hung your choice

And loiter about as if by some unshaken remorse

Glowering in derision which consumes your voice

Moist as a soft kiss once lost forever missed

One among the long list of lost moments of bliss

Remiss if left unsaid don't outweigh the memories betrayed

And flayed open to leave what remains displayed

So tell me now is it reminiscence or deliverance

Which hesitation presents as patience or fear

A smear of life lingering here on the floor

More or less just one part of the core

Toward which it is less of a jest

Pressed to the mold so it could be either one life or the next

Its all just pretense, no more, no less

Stoned Philosophical Rant

(Photo Credit: Unknown Photographer Creative Commons/gravityglue.com)

I feel an ebb of confusion welling up within me, echoing like a heartbeat that is growing in intensity. The source of the confusion isn't clear, it's as if a multitude of facets coordinated an attack on my subconscious; distracting me as they detract the attention of my focus. A parallel to my conventions is dissimilar to my self, hidden beneath the surface of my skin like a pebble below a pond; obscured by algae and scum, but visible only in the hues it represents.
I redouble my mental faculties in order to preserve the image, to understand and comprehend it's meaning, but the more my mind stresses the picture the more rips and tears it rends, distorting the image further. Not only are the enemies which assail me external but there exist internal foes which seem even more dangerous; more-so because they don't instigate events, only perpetuate the existence of those events. I find that I cannot dissuade my mind, nor can I articulate enough to disengage my clarity from these detractors. Eternally shall they be married and my perceptive goals lost to me.
I am my own worst enemy, unable to disentangle events cause externally from my internal struggles, and my struggles persist beyond my control. I am lost and losing still for I fight a battle I cannot win. I cannot win only because I fight, and realize only then that my fighting, my desire to fight is where I lose my focus, my clarity. So I remove the shackles of my desire, severing the chains which bind me. I focus not on the external conflicts, I resist my urges until they exist no more.
Now I'm free, I have escaped. I don't dwell on those battles which I had lost before I even began to fight, I don't dwell on those forces which exist beyond my self or are self centered in their existence. For my focus to be clear I must clear my focus, and see not what see's me. Only then am I free, disentangled from the cause of my torment, disillusioned to the cause of my pain, aggravation, and fears. Only through the mere schism of self from the world can I then focus on the world of self, and live in the harmony of being, to exist within the world which is free from all discomfort, for there is nothing which needs comfort in the world of self, and as such nothing can exist to detract from a comfort that does not exist.
My focus returned, but only for so long as I refuse my focus from the world, but as I do the world then refuses my focus. there can be no compromise; for one to exist completely, the other must completely not exist. The world of the middle would be preferable, but then the choice becomes the dangerous tangle of focus and the world, and the events which become enemies, and enemies which exist to perpetuate events.
The tormented becomes the tormentor, the cause the effect. And what tangible benefit can one reap from a tormented mind, one conscious of the fact that they will never completely possess the focus of virtue they seek, and the focus of a mind capable of seeking solace from that torment. The conundrum lies in that; to be free of the torment of the world, the world ,must be free of torment, but for torment to be nonexistent one must be detached from the world so that the complete potential of their focus can be applied; but in complete focus lies nothing worldly, so for one to focus on the world completely they will lose all focus, but in loosing all the world they have focus with nothing to apply it to. In a simple way one can focus on nothing or have nothing to focus on.



Thanks for reading. Get stoned and share a rant of your own in the comments.

Nine Moments Of A Soul

(Photo Credit: Ethereal by mudwrestler http://www.deviantart.com/art/Ethereal-69070526)

1

We start in the middle
Of a ceremonious ring.
One not fought,
Thoughtful lies,
Bleeds me one and just the same.
On half my lines drawn, drunken heroes of heathens harpers.
And the other is a heroine dosed junkie, jamming a steel rod into the heart of the sinner.
They both kill me,
Kill me, the same.
Pledge to open up that wound, and profess
My courage,
Greed, and hate;
All the same.
Now point me in the direction of your pain,
I felt it coming before it began.
Like the hissing of rain before the storm,
And I remember it like the crackling inside my brain, as the thunder left
Opened, and flowing through the guilt ridden fence.
The partition of my life, gone to rest.
No longer will I fade, before my demise,
I'll shine.
Until it is my time
To rain down among you all.
Will free will; in gilded fist,
Screaming the injustice,
And the truth of spear torn chest.
Face me now!
Until, you have no way
Out of here.
To taste my flesh on bloodstained lips,
As you have killed me, and stole my breath.
But just as you drained me,
I am whole,
Here,
Inside the storm.
Without my skin,
No wall to guard me
But now; before it all
Came
Crumbling down,
The lightning flashed,
As your tears came down,
And as the blade came down.
I felt the look, in your eyes,
As I have died,
I will die,
And I don’t mind at all,
I don’t mind.
As a tear falls from your eyes,
As a blade falls between my ribs,
And I scream my injustice.
I know the truth,
I slip away, and
You are left here.
As I slip away,
I feel you
Still breathing,
Standing here, on soft blood covered ground.

2

There was so much he was willing to say,
So many words, in so many phrases,
And all of it empty, just plain.
Lies, he spewed forth to appease the weak of mind,
Fruit born of ashes, stained.
So tell us, now ,as you stand before their blade,
How you are so unafraid?
Well, we wish you good penance, for your meaningless sacrifice.
Unjust you say?
Well, so long as you didn't spit in their mouths,
And pour out their wine.
So who now should they jest, and torment?
Surely, not their own minds, with that sugar coated vomit.
As long as you’re the one who’s willing to state,
I’ll agree, in the shadows, of a dumb mans stale bravery,
And brevity!
For in the face of the crowd
There seems no choice, but to cheer him on, and end his selfless suffering!
So speak now, and let us know what to place
On cold dark stone.
What empty words have you chose for us, to carve in boulders?
Give us now the name of your tombstone,
Goodbye.

3

In the cold absence I acquiesce,
My will of fire, and all my regrets.
Beg not a beggar for shame, if only there were solitary words to place,
And appease the mind of some foolish; who believe,
That all of the storms are accompanied by rain.
But hear me now, and know my peace.
For there is very little, in this world,
Left for me.
I will share with you all
My little sacrament.
To the gilded halls of Valhalla, I will place,
Left alone as I battle, in the day,
And at night, as I feast upon my enemies flesh,
And fill those halls with my angered breath.
Carved in stone, with emeralds and sapphires,
And stationed like a sentry, to all who can see.
Written are those hallowed phrases;
My last wish,
And all of my engagements,
And if you can bear it no ill will,
I shall see you all; as day light fades,
And as the night wanes, but never changes.
Scarred, by the light of the moon,
And heed these deified pages.
For they were handed down,
From those in the heavens stationed,
And they read:

4

"Remember the tidings,
For I bid them farewell.
All, and everyone,
Who, in this world
Are doomed to fail.
Not in their endeavors,
With children, husband, or wife;
But, in the grand scheme.
As all share
A singular destiny,
And, that is in fact.
That what is coveted most
Is bound to wane.
What awaits all living souls
Is death,
In this cycle of life.
So fear not the time you are given
Rejoice in this verity
Above all creatures on this earth
There are none who are conscious of selflessness
And rebirth
Save one
That is to say that all who are aware
Sing in glorious praise
To life and all of its fame
That you are not alone
For in everything do you ration
In the earth you find soil and grain
In lakes and rivers there is water for your basin
And in the sky above air to breath
Within fire you find the most amazing being
A conscious thought
And awakened creature
Sparks of ingenuity and incongruous exceptional chattels
For in the loneliness of the darkest night
As each of you stare into the others eyes
See inside of yourself
And become aware of the guiding light
All were made equal
In all things do you marvel
And in all things will you share
For you are
Loved"

5

Don’t feel abated
Screen not your unconscious thoughts
Feel the warmth of life
And all of its faults
I wouldn’t ask a singular
Shallow man
To fully
Understand
But I will see that in this you soon will believe
That all of this is just rinky dink
Not chance
Not fate
Not even a coincidence
But faultless
As a child who breaths
I can’t say the truth is too hard to believe
But if in every one of those pills
You could find
A piece of hallowed
Sacred sacraments of time
In inconsistent fruitless maneuvers
You’ll see it was truly all your own doing
Every mistake
Even the smallest of bruising
All the pain in your life
And all your happiest moments
Inside you find hidden deep beneath the pallet
Buried beneath all of those superficial
Nuances
Every aspect of your being
Is all included in your own undoing

6

In the beginning
Of this cretins thing
His hallowed and unsanctimonious being
He wasn’t always this way
At one time innocence
It crept
Slowly as a snail
Lost in a forest of regrets
Pondering each new fallen leaf
Every stem and feather
And broken tree
Full of hopes and dreams
But lost inside of a cumbersome scene
He found that everything wasn’t always as it seemed
He tried he really did
But after each new freshly opened wound
He could bear it no more
As lemon juice was poured down
Deep into the veins
And the sting of it all was there was no one else to blame
He tried to forget
With his passions disinterest
But all he could do was begin
Digging his shovel deep into the earth
Next to the fallen trunks
In the forests canopy
Were the birds no longer fly
They don’t roost
And the trees are barren of leaves
His abandoned home
And his lost memories
He tried to forget his misery
But in the effort he lost his dreams
It saddened his heart
And he abused his mind
With substances whose use is a crime
When he found he couldn’t pass his regrets
He tried to replace the loneliness
In the darkness of his hours darkened days
He found his companion
A perfect soul that wouldn’t
Abate

7

She was cared for in her own congruous ways
But not before any peculiar means
Did she fight off
Or live without
Demons
Her own burdens did she bear
Through all her tousles and all she could place
It was never in her sight
But it was well situated in her
Fate
Through those moments were they joined
On a miraculous day
Did these souls unite
In a most mysterious way
It seemed it was too good to be true
And in fact that was what is was
But inside of doubt did it
Last

8

Through the anger and the pain
The deceit and the rage
No more would it last
As it all began to fade
Someone was dear and that was all it would be
Just a singular moment
Inside a billion of the first stars last
Dying rays
As they die their sparks unite
Inside a billion more will they soon
Ignite
But for the couple it wasn’t the same
There were more uncleanly feelings
Than beautiful moments could save
He pushed her away
And she rejected his love
In regrets did they say
The most hateful of terms
He killed the happiness
She long slaved to maintain
And she butchered the love
He so panged for and craved
But it was all in
Naught

9

In the end
Of this most copious being
Unceremonious cruel exchange of feelings
The lexicon was vulgar and the terms were harsh
But all was meant
And all was lost
They shared in the one truest time they could present
Savored the moments
And all the pain they could repay
Tear it free
And feel what you must
Know the power
Of my tongue
My lust
For hatred hungered and fed
On the last living memories
Of their love they
Shed
They argued the poignant points
They stuffed the wrongs of each others down their throats
Knowing solidarity would save
But it wasn’t meant to be
It would never satiated what their hearts did crave
The blood of the other
And they pain they would create
But he could bear it no more
It was all in shame
It took all he could brave
And as she found him dying
She held him and heard his last breath
In his own voice this is what he
Said
“I’m so sorry
I couldn’t have known
In this last undying eternal love
I didn’t know what I was doing
Guess it was all just a show
I didn’t want to hurt you
But that is all I know
I’ve never been exposed
To the love you had known
But thanks to you
I truly am aware
It just wasn’t in the cards
And for you with this burden to bear
I can’t forgive myself for the pain I’ve caused
And ruining your chances at adornment
So now I say my last farewell
As I turn and walk down this road
I am facing an angel so pure
But I’m a demon who’s never known love
Before or after your touch
Never forget what you meant to me
The truest and happiest of beings
In my own personal torment
I’m the one who’s created this cell
I was too shallow
To false
A thorn in the side
Of all I’ve known
And now its time I die
I wish it weren’t so
But it is
And for you this pain I couldn’t save
As I walk down this road
But I will be looking over your shoulder
I will watch as you blossom and grow
But it is my time
To find my grave
My love”